“I approach the red colored house of mine, which had outlasted four-generations before me and could easily shelter four more, of course with some maintenance and care; the iron rusty gates creak as I open them – Home Sweet Home!!! My dogs – a Pomeranian and an Alsatian run towards me; they race each other to be first to lick my face. I squeeze and pat both of them with glee. I have had a lot of pets since I was a kid.
As I draw closer to the house I was born and brought up in, lived a quarter of my life; I hear the hustle bustle of my relatives. Like every alternate Sunday both my paternal and maternal cousins have gathered to meet and catch up. Everyone lives within a 50km radius.
After a long day of fun, frolic, laughter and delicious food, I head out to meet up my childhood friends at the usual meeting spot of our old school’s playground. We slog the entire week and afterwards we get together to re energise ourselves for the upcoming long week ahead.
A friend casually mentions the wedding of a former classmate with a common college friend of ours. Thank goodness the wedding is on a Saturday evening, we make the travel arrangements accordingly. There I meet my best friend from childhood who had moved abroad for a few years and has recently returned. I get delighted to hear he plans to settle here. We catch up and we realise we have too much in common and plan to catch up yet again.
A few months later we get married with huge pomp and show; my friend circle count beating my relatives and guests’ count. Even the long distance friends (the ones who work in neighbouring states) have flown in to attend the ceremony, they had to, we classmates are one big family after all. My Facebook wall is flooded with selfies from all angles with all possible people permutations.
Thankfully I don’t head too far post wedding. I live a blissful life of comfort just a few blocks away. I live among the habitual faces, I grow old in the familiar streets, everyday I wake up to the same views, I live a life of routine which is never boring nor accustomed yet so customary. I never outgrow the feeling of familiarity and the sense of belongingness never outgrows me either.”
Many people actually are lucky enough to have lived this fictional life from my dreams that I described above, many have taken it for granted, many even long for a change of location, place and faces. All my life I have lived in different locations, changing schools, colleges, friend circles owing to my dad’s transferable job. The moment I thought I was settled somewhere we had to shift and I had to start all over again, which was never easy. Until college we met relatives ceremoniously in some marriage functions or the vacations. Come engineering and my co-ordinates shifted forever. Hostel and classes made it difficult for me to stay home for more than a few days and things got from bad to worse when I got the remote posting of Trivandrum, which was far far away. The few measly days that I got as leaves were spent visiting home. Relatives grew farther and old friends gradually shifted to phone-a-friends-on-regular-to-rarely basis. Finally when I decided to marry and shift my locations even further away, everything and everyone have reduced to a mere whatsapp contact.
I am not regretting my life, it has been a good one with lot of learning experiences, I have been lucky to travel across the length and breadth of India and meet a vast category of people. Every state of our country offers a rich flora, fauna and mindset as well. Distances have time and again made me realise who my true kith and kins are. Distances have brought good friends closer and the real bonds have deepened with time while the fake ones have wilted away.
All I am trying to say is sometimes I long the extended family get together during school summer vacations; the entertainment filled wedding functions of my cousins which I have missed over the last years on the pretext of semester exams, Infosys training exams, finally leave shortages; the weddings of my close friends I missed, my desire of keeping pets which I kept postponing till I had a house of my own, calling a house home, lastly and most importantly my identity, the sense of belonging to a street/ city/ state. I still fumble for a minute when someone asks me where do I belong and even though it may sound a laughing matter and a problem non-existent for most of us, it has been a thought provoking matter for me which has made me stop & ponder time and again.
May be in a parallel universe, in an afterlife, when God agrees to grant a wish I would ask for familiarity, a lifelong never-ending deep-rooted enduring permanent familiarity.
As I draw closer to the house I was born and brought up in, lived a quarter of my life; I hear the hustle bustle of my relatives. Like every alternate Sunday both my paternal and maternal cousins have gathered to meet and catch up. Everyone lives within a 50km radius.
After a long day of fun, frolic, laughter and delicious food, I head out to meet up my childhood friends at the usual meeting spot of our old school’s playground. We slog the entire week and afterwards we get together to re energise ourselves for the upcoming long week ahead.
A friend casually mentions the wedding of a former classmate with a common college friend of ours. Thank goodness the wedding is on a Saturday evening, we make the travel arrangements accordingly. There I meet my best friend from childhood who had moved abroad for a few years and has recently returned. I get delighted to hear he plans to settle here. We catch up and we realise we have too much in common and plan to catch up yet again.
A few months later we get married with huge pomp and show; my friend circle count beating my relatives and guests’ count. Even the long distance friends (the ones who work in neighbouring states) have flown in to attend the ceremony, they had to, we classmates are one big family after all. My Facebook wall is flooded with selfies from all angles with all possible people permutations.
Thankfully I don’t head too far post wedding. I live a blissful life of comfort just a few blocks away. I live among the habitual faces, I grow old in the familiar streets, everyday I wake up to the same views, I live a life of routine which is never boring nor accustomed yet so customary. I never outgrow the feeling of familiarity and the sense of belongingness never outgrows me either.”
Many people actually are lucky enough to have lived this fictional life from my dreams that I described above, many have taken it for granted, many even long for a change of location, place and faces. All my life I have lived in different locations, changing schools, colleges, friend circles owing to my dad’s transferable job. The moment I thought I was settled somewhere we had to shift and I had to start all over again, which was never easy. Until college we met relatives ceremoniously in some marriage functions or the vacations. Come engineering and my co-ordinates shifted forever. Hostel and classes made it difficult for me to stay home for more than a few days and things got from bad to worse when I got the remote posting of Trivandrum, which was far far away. The few measly days that I got as leaves were spent visiting home. Relatives grew farther and old friends gradually shifted to phone-a-friends-on-regular-to-rarely basis. Finally when I decided to marry and shift my locations even further away, everything and everyone have reduced to a mere whatsapp contact.
I am not regretting my life, it has been a good one with lot of learning experiences, I have been lucky to travel across the length and breadth of India and meet a vast category of people. Every state of our country offers a rich flora, fauna and mindset as well. Distances have time and again made me realise who my true kith and kins are. Distances have brought good friends closer and the real bonds have deepened with time while the fake ones have wilted away.
All I am trying to say is sometimes I long the extended family get together during school summer vacations; the entertainment filled wedding functions of my cousins which I have missed over the last years on the pretext of semester exams, Infosys training exams, finally leave shortages; the weddings of my close friends I missed, my desire of keeping pets which I kept postponing till I had a house of my own, calling a house home, lastly and most importantly my identity, the sense of belonging to a street/ city/ state. I still fumble for a minute when someone asks me where do I belong and even though it may sound a laughing matter and a problem non-existent for most of us, it has been a thought provoking matter for me which has made me stop & ponder time and again.
May be in a parallel universe, in an afterlife, when God agrees to grant a wish I would ask for familiarity, a lifelong never-ending deep-rooted enduring permanent familiarity.
